Monday, September 18, 2006

The Subaru Impreza TS, Weekend bliss, Car Clubs and MPV nonsense

Last Sunday I had the opportunity to stretch the legs of my Impreza TS as I had a ‘kenduri’ to attend in Muar. The car performed well, on the highway I managed to push its puny 1.6liter engine to 205km/h, which translate to a mean maximum of 200km/h as it always is around 5km/h slower than the speedometer reading when I look at the speedtrap notice board when you hit the first and second bends on the Kerinci Link from the Federal Highway. Quite amazing when you have a heavy, power sapping All Wheel Drive train and passengers. It felt solid as a rock at high speeds and only the engine turns pretty high at 5500rpm partly due to the gearing. That’s why big cc’s are very important and 1.6liters are limited to cruising at slower speeds (Unless you happen to have a couple of thousand Ringgit to do it up). Aside from that, it was pretty good and was even better after the Tangkak Toll, where the highway exits to a trunk road. This is where the Impreza shines. It’s not about the grip, but also the handling. The Impreza TS is one of those cars that let the average family man enjoy things abit. Note that there are not many of these kinds of vehicles in Malaysia. But let’s go back to Sundays.


Sunday is the day where most people decide to do what they like the most. It is the day where we’ve all set in our minds to do what we actually want to do throughout their life if they have a choice. Some would spend it tinkering on their workbench with their power tools. Some would sit around with a bag of chips in hand and vege out in front of the telly. Some would play with their pets. Some would just play with themselves. Some would decide to spend time with loved ones and do fun things with them. The options are endless. But honestly, if you would have a choice, would it be going out with your car club members throughout your whole natural life?

I suppose it might be pretty okay if you are affiliated to the Ferrari Owner’s club, where all you would do is talk about each other’s million-ringgit toy. Then start complaining that you have nowhere to service your Ferrari except at the local agents, which charge stupid money for a filter change. It also would be okay if you were to join the Lancer Evolution Club, where you can hang out with bankers, senior execs as well as your neighbourhood ah-longs or VCD sellers as the ratio of owners is about the same. I also suppose it would be fine if you wanted to hand out with a non specific performance car club and just talk about speed and performance all day. Car clubs are actually a problem, as you actually want to hang out with people owning the same car as you and then when you stop owning the same car, you drop out from the club. It’s quite sad sometimes.

But how great would it be if you joined the Toyota Avanza Owner’s Club if you had an Avanza? How great would it be if you had a Naza Ria and joined the Naza Ria Owner’s Club? This actually got me thinking as I passed by a group of Toyota Wishes on the way out of Kuala Lumpur at the Sungai Besi Toll.

Now who could be the average Toyota Wish Owner? A person with a wife, 2 pre-teen kids and a maid. Now his reason for buying this car is that it is a Toyota, it can carry a lot of people and drives somewhat like a car. That is pretty okay come to think of it. But how can a whole bunch of the same demographic meet and talk about MPV stuff? What would be discussed? Would words like the following come out of a Wish Owner?
“how much rubber can my Wish burn”,
“Can my Wish go around Sepang in 2mins 10secs?”
“What combo of springs and shocks work for my Van?”
I seriously doubt it.

What comes to mind are only two things that are mildly interesting for someone to talk about their MPV. Firstly, how loud an ICE system can I shove in my MPV? And Secondly, How do I BLING it up. And that’s it! What else can you talk about your MPVs that would amuse others around you?

If you go to online Internet forums, you’ll get dull people comming up with questions like:
“How much mileage does your car get.

Do we really need to know how much petrol your MPV consumes? If you really cared about rising petrol costs, you should know that lugging around extra weight makes your car consume more petrol than it should. Buy a Kancil if fuel bills worry you. Ask your family to walk on weekend trips. They’ll thank you for clean arteries.
“Can I carry my pet poodle with my luggage, 4 kids, my wife and my maid if I decide to go for a drive in the country?”
“Does your MPV have a roof rack?”

If you’re asking questions like that, it basically means you bought the WRONG MPV. You should have gotten one with everything on it. Not come up with questions like these. Buy the new Toyota Hiace Van, it seats 10 easily and has space for 20 poodles, if you pile them up properly. It has that brutish tonka toy look, it’s cheap and it’s still a Toyota if you have a thing for Toyotas. Creature comforts? It has air conditioning and seats. What more do you need?
“ I can’t seem to manoeuvre my Toyota Alphard properly, do you know of anyone who can add more parking cameras to it?”
“My Alphard seems to take up too much space in my porch. I need a new bungalow”

See where this is taking us? Space utilisation levels of the Starship Enteprise . What we need on jam packed roads of Malaysia are TARDISes, not Enterprises.

It’s just quite simple actually, how cool can you look if you stop in front of a nightspot at step out of an Avanza, Innova, Unser, Wish, Stream, Ria etc? The first thought that comes to mind from most people is “Ah, family man” and then they turn away from you, totally uninterested in what you’d be doing. Yes, there’s nothing wrong with that image, as in truth you may be already married and with kids, but the problem is, MPVs show this image too much. It dulls the already dull exterior of an average family man. While the Toyota Wish and Honda Stream are good MPVs that drive like cars, I can’t seem to have the need to rush out and buy one.

Back to the Wish convoy at Sungai Besi toll, where were they off to? Did they have loads of fun following the rear of each other’s Wish trying to read each other’s bumper sticker? Did they enjoy cruising along some B road slowing down traffic? Did they enjoy ogling each other’s wives or daughters? I don’t know. I wasn’t interested in finding out. I love it when our rich neighbours down south have a convoy. Sometimes we see a bunch of Ferraris, Porsches and more amazing cars going up north. These are convoys that all of us should aim for. We should use MPVs for family commutes, and that’s about it. Meeting up and chatting about an MPV shouldn’t be someone’s idea of fun throughout his or her natural lives. In fact it’s scary.

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