Recently Manchester United lost to Liverpool. Some may say that this is a rare occurrence and that the fans of Liverpool have poured into the streets rejoicing at the victory. That its players played gallantly and that they thoroughly deserved that victory. It was a battle royal between the two and the best team won. Manchester United fought well but they lost. The referee was blind. The players were careless. Some were dead men playing. Liverpool was at their best. The bookies bribed the players. If Bryan Robson were playing Manchester United wouldn't have lost. Beckham shouldn't have married Posh Spice and may Beckham leave the team. I wish Kenny Daglish were still playing. If Ronaldo didn't leave things would be different. Men in shorts are my kinda thing. Now what I just typed would made sense to either one of the team's supporters but I'm sorry, but those of you motorheads who choose to support either Manchester United or Liverpool should stop doing so.
Near fanatical support of Manchester United would mean that you are the no different from a billion or so people who support the same team. Supporting Liverpool means the same thing, although there may be slightly less of you Liverpool fans out there. Do remember that the word 'fan' is derived from the word 'fanatic and it means you are this close to becoming an axe murderer. All it needs is spark by a Liverpool fan (if you are a Man U fan) to diss your team and you may just pummel his head with your fist and end up slightly dead. But the main point is this. If you are a motorhead you should stop supporting either team as it is a waste of your time and money. Mainly a waste time if you don't place large bets anyway.
If you're a motorhead, you'd be better reading that car magazine of yours or looking at other forms of car pornography instead of watching 22 grown men chase a ball round a field. The problem with football is that it is boring. It has become so tactical that you don't see someone run rings from the middle of the field, through the midfield players, through the defender's legs and then in between the keeper's legs to score a goal. Now we get to hear tactics, lobs, passes, defensive play, coaches shouting from the edge of the field but no actual dribbling, no risk taking or no Pele or Maradona kind of magic anymore. It's absolutely dull watching grown men in shorts passing from one to another and then try some stupid cross to score. There's no Geoff Hurst style of like flying in the air kind of kick in the '66 World Cup or a Maradona dribble from the middle of the field straight through a shocked England defence sometime in the late 70s. There's no actual magic. Even watching Brazil play in the last world cup was like watching a ball tied to a string but no actual scoring or finala finishing touches. It was bloody boring. I mean what's the point of sacrificing late nights watching nothing interesting except some 'free kick specialists' fall down and get a free kick for their teams? They don't play football, it's as bad as watching wrestling on TV. At least you know they're faking it there.
Now another problem with either Manchester United or a Liverpool fan is that they can get pretty anal about their teams. Like here, I put Manchester before Liverpool. This little fact would upset some Liverpool fans because I didn't put their team before their arch rivals in this article. It's outrageous. I have to say that both are regarded by yours truly to be as good as the other, which is actually inconsequential to the well being of planet Earth. You see, if a meteor were to hit both teams while they were playing life would still go on. No country is going to go bust, no one will die of hunger and certainly no one will run out of things to do if such an event were to occur. I suppose some Chelsea fans would rejoice, but that's not the point.
The biggest reason on why you as a motorhead should not bother with either team is that if you were to spend your money purchasing tickets, souvenirs, ESPN subscriptions or even posters on any of the teams, you are actually making some football star who may be as clever as the turnip planted by some British farmer or a footballer that speaks in a squaky voice be filthy rich. You are sponsoring their slightly lavish lifestyle by paying for their Bentley Continental GTs, their Aston Martins and their Ferraris. It is you who enable those that do not need to study hard for their PHDs, MBAs or even go to Iraq to fight for their country to live fantastically rich lives. And the irony is, do they really care about the riots that happen after their games? Most of them end up in some posh restaurant eating cuisine food with their WAGs. Whereas you'd be at some teh tarik mamak shop and have a cheap piece of roti canai which is just plain flour, suddenly becomming more clever than the coaches that actually coached the teams in the first place. Do they actually care about you eating normal food? Do they even know you exist? All they know is you bought that club scarf and paid for your ESPN subscription that enables them to maintain their exclusive lifestyle. What about your lifestyle? Instead of watching them, you could save the world, read a book or take a nice drive somewherec during that 90 minutes of boredom. If you are not a footballer in the first place, why bother watching it? Woudn't it be better playing the game instead of watching a game where there's no more magic nowadays? The game won't change. Its too boring and tactical I say again. If you want a change, don't watch it anymore.
Then again, if you're here in Malaysia, why are you bothered about some bloke on the other side of the world? Do you even know that John Major isn't the Prime Minister of England anymore? Do you know what's the current economic situation in Britain? Do you know that having tea is a very English thing? I know you do know that two English teams played football and one team won. Is that worthwhile information for some of you? I suppose it is, but you should stop. You need to aim for that Bentley and not let those footballers buy such cars and make them cheaper, image-wise, than they actually are. I mean, does Mr Rooney or squeaky voice Beckham make a fine Aston Martin or a Bentley ambassador? You'd actually be cringing at that thought and remember the next time there's a game on telly that you think will make a difference in the world. It won't. Don't bother, go read a Haynes manual, as its more productive.
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